Wild Thing 9/9

So, this is the last section... Now, I am both aware of a) how few people have actually read this blog and b) how much time and effort would be involved to comment on everything you read. So, I'm not asking/demanding/extorting comments. However, if people could find it in themselves to just tick the response boxes, which will just take a couple of seconds, that'd be golden. Thanks!

28/09/2013

So that’s the whole story. If you were expecting it, you’re sicker than me. And hey, I’m a murderer!

Or not even a murderer, really. I mean I didn’t shoot her or stab her or poison her. All I did was swerve a bit into her lane. It’s scary really, how easy it was. All I had to do was turn a wheel and I snuffed out my best friend’s life.

And everyone is talking about it, comforting me. Trying to help me, reach me, when I don’t even know if there’s a me to reach. I feel like part of me will always be stuck in that moment. Like part of me died with Rach.

And you want to know the funny thing? All these people, they want to help me. I mean they might not know me, their efforts might be clumsy and ineffectual, but they are trying. I act all superior, I openly despise them, but if they knew… they would hate me. Despise me. Feel superior.

But I won’t feel guilty. I don’t feel guilty. It was self-defence if you think about it. She called her boss to arrange to have me killed. What else could I do? So I blackmailed her first. That’s not a crime, is it? Or… maybe it is, but not a hanging offence, surely? Not something that gives a lifelong friend an excuse to try and kill you.

I guess there is one question left. Why’d I start it all? Why did I blackmail my best friend? Here’s the thing. I was going to be there at the drop. Just a little disguise and she wouldn’t even recognise me. I didn’t want any money. That’s not what I blackmailed her for.

All I wanted was for her to kiss me.